Tag: experiences

If you want to be a leader try to become a storyteller

 I became aware last year of the power of storytelling. Our children have a way to show us the impact of a story, but we often diminish its role: this is just a story! What a shame… Children know best.  I believe storytelling has a powerful transformative ingredient worth remembering and considering, as we try to make changes around us or within our lives. 

We often carry on with life wondering how to get out of a situation where we feel stuck. We may even give up. We may yet realize that whatever may be the situation, it is always the result of choices we made consciously or unconsciously. We may even know deep down that this realization is the best way to take one hundred percent responsibility in how we feel and understand that, as a result, we have in us the power to get out of it.  Despite this awareness, we may have lost the ability or never consciously learned how to affect change and get out of our “stuckness.” This is because we have lost track of the link between where we are and the story we have been telling ourselves. 

Let us say that you have been telling yourself that you always fail… or you simply fear failure based on past experiences; this will block your ability to succeed. But you have the power to change the story you have been telling yourself. Listen to children changing their stories to get to the result they want… it is that easy! Acknowledge that you have been trying hard and did your best, spelling out all your actions and qualities, remembering the fine moments on your path. Then redress towards where you want to go. In doing this kind of work, you make it possible for a positive story to emerge, and for you to get out of a stuck place. Enjoy going after your new story for 2020!

Fear of failure

The fear of failure is a common experience that can be changed. Everyone has fears and they exist for a reason. Fear is an important mechanism to protect us and help us deal with a potential danger. The challenge is that fear may keep us from participating fully in life and venture outside of our zone of comfort. We have to realize that fear shows up by anticipation, based on previous experiences, not only as a response to real and present danger. Fear is based on thoughts that are stored and used as data in our mind to elicit certain responses. Once we realize the mechanism, we can choose to hack our own computer of a brain, and trigger a different response. We can always generate new reactions, new brain connections by choosing new thoughts. 

What if failure was a good thing?What if failure was a way to learn and innovate, a technic to master (fail, fail and fail better), a path towards mastery. I remember thinking that failure should be taught in school. There are so many things to learn from failures. It leads to a gradual process of reconquering lost ground to be repeated over and over again towards success, like a child learning to walk – falling time and again – until he or she finds balance.

You may feel that you stand out when you fail, that all eyes are on you, and nobody could be as bad as you. These feelings are common, but you can overcome them, especially if you disconnect the fear triggered by the thought of failing. When you learn to observe your thoughts and their connections to the way you feel, you can find a way to change the feeling around the thought of failing. Think and feel the positive charge around failing. You will gain freedom, no longer ruled by the fear to fail.

Time for boredom!

For leaders and most of us it can be challenging to find time for ourselves, separate from the outside world, to feed our inner world. I decided this year to take real time off over the holiday season. I realized that taking a break was, of course, necessary to attend to built-up stress and indulge in nurturing activities. It allowed me to push back on responsibility, play, walk, and (re)discover the joy of being lazy and the gift of boredom.

Have you noticed how we human beings thrive on novelty, and how quickly we get past novelty to find our new source of pleasure transforms into a tedious activity after a while. We get easily bored in search of new experiences. At core, life may just be about experiencing, and boredom the necessary “evil” to motivate us and drive ourselves to explore new experiments, new ideas, and summon creative energy. This may actually be THE pathway to self-awareness and inner work.

Among the key trends for today’s leadership, greater self-awareness has been identified as a must for leaders, and necessary for most of us in challenging times. Boredom may actually be your best friend! It all depends on how you CHOOSE to respond to it; whether you reach out for external drivers–possibly vices to fill the emptiness–or whether you reach within to generate your own way out. In fact, a bored mind may become the canvas against which innovation is born. It takes leadership to find your way out of boredom, but it also requires inspiration and creativity. May you all get inspired in 2019!