When I look back on my life, I am amazed at how I managed to survive the many trials and tribulations in my path, and I am sure this resonates with many of you. We all seem to underestimate how much we can handle, but life has a way of showing us the way to a hidden reserve. Whether we get to it through sheer willpower cutting through our resistance, or whether we overcome our inner blocks through compassion for our predicament, we always seem to reach for a new level of understanding of our inner strength.
Over time men and women have developed their own leadership styles, either fighting their way through, enduring one loss after another, opening the way for others to catch their breath, wondering when life will offer a break, or simply accepting overwhelm, exhaustion and offering compassion and unconditional support to themselves and others. Yet, women and men alike have suffered from internal barriers to receiving the level of support they need to succeed.
Have you noticed how this manifests in your life? You do not want to appear weak, inadequate, or needy. You do not want to be indebted to someone else. You do not want to burden others with your problems. How many of you are actually seeking support to overcome your challenges? In our western masculine culture, we celebrate the power of the individual and we have long held the belief that we are weak, inadequate, and somehow flawed when we cannot master our own lives by ourselves. We are essentially suffering from a “support deficit.”
There is an alternative based on a different belief, i.e.: “you cannot become your powerful self by yourself.” Through this different approach, leadership for yourself and others is more of a team sport than a solo race. Leadership becomes less and less about inner strength to face up to your personal or collective challenges. It anchors instead in a shared commitment to feed each other power and to support one another to step into our full potential. For this type of leadership we need to level up our relationships, rather than rely on inner strength. This approach speaks of trust and the willingness to be vulnerable, and will be addressed in our next blogs. See you there!